Towards the end of our wedding, I toasted our guests. I wanted them to know how truly special they were. I wanted to thank our dear friends and family for not only celebrating us, but for making us for who we were.

You see, the wedding industry will sometimes insist that the entire wedding is really about the bride: her taste, preferences, beauty, clothes, and general perfection. But those of us who have walked even a day through marriage, or have seen others do so, know that this is far from the truth. The joining of two people is about community. It’s about sacrificial love, and the village that surrounds that love to keep it alive.

Daisy + Aaron Wedding

Our opening toast...

Our opening toast…

My husband and I knew that we needed our families, friends, teachers, mentors and leaders in order to be our best selves. Despite the fact that we were, in many ways, leaving one community to join an entirely new one by moving to a new place, we wanted to remember the importance of opening our relationship and our home to others.

Closing toast, given by me.

Closing toast, given by me.

So, I toasted the guests, our wedding creatives, and our family in order to remind them as well as myself of this truth. Here’s my toast!

Most people think that the wedding is just about the bride. Not this wedding. Tonight is not only a celebration of a lifelong vow and commitment, but also a time of thanksgiving for the village that raised this child and her husband to be the people we are today. Some of you were there when we were just a dream in our parents’ lives; others when we were toddlers; in grade school; the turbulent teenage years as we faced many of our first insecurities and trials as young people; and of course college, the season that formed our deepest desires, wildest dreams and some of our best friendships.

You were there, and you taught us, challenged us, supported us, blessed us, fed us, prayed for us and believed in us. The man and woman you see before you today are proud to have walked with your friendship and mentorship. And as we go forth into this next season– to heal the human heart, to teach the underprivileged, to mentor the children in our lives and to build our own family– we hope you know that our success is yours too. Thank you.

I would also like to raise a glass to all the people who made and are making this incredible night come together. They are not all here, but we could not be more grateful for their thoughtful diligence, creativity and patience. …

And finally, to our parents. Helping us make this wedding happen is only a small part of how we are indebted to you. From our education to our scraped up knees, our broken hearts to our highest highs– you have seen us through it all. You celebrated our victories and made our biggest dreams come true. You lifted up our heads and pushed us to taste and experience real beauty, joy, friendship and service. From the arms we would run to, to the knowing pride and support we cherish– we admire you more and more as time goes by. And we know you are proud to call us your own. Because we our proud to call you ours. 

So, needless to say, there are lots of incredible people in this room. One bride, and a hundred fifty of you. So cheers everyone. Tonight is your night too.

Daisy + Aaron Wedding Daisy + Aaron Wedding

Do you expect the wedding to be all about the bride? Or is it more about the people there? I would love to know!

{Read last week’s Wedding Snapshots: Florals and Details}